Updated: May 10, 2019
Back and forth, just like my emotions.
I'm not sure when this song was written. I know the melody came to me in a dream and when I woke up, the lyrics appeared on a page without any knowledge of me writing them. I've read about this happening but never really believed it until now...
"I've been chasing beauty and painted gold" are some of my personal favorite lyrics from songs I've written. I had a hard time understanding their meaning, at first, but after digesting for a while, they seem to perfectly encapsulate the time I spent surrounded by beautiful friends and glamorous parties.
I had dreamed of being one of the 'cool kids' my entire life, and here I was surrounded by beautiful people, cars, houses and parties but the closer I got to them, the more I realized they were not as beautiful as they appeared. The people were nasty and vain. The cars were leased, not owned. The houses were bought by their parents. The parties were riddled with wannabes and drug addicts. The life I thought I wanted was a lie.
The moon held me while I cried and when I was ready, guided me to my true path.